Life is so funny sometimes. I mean, just the way things turn out, when the unexpected fantasy becomes a reality. This has happened to me a few times in my life in fact. When I was 3rd row for my first Mariah Carey concert in 2003 (I have idolized her since I was a young girl); when I went to my first New Kids On The Block concert last year after 20 years of waiting for that and even got to touch Jon Knight’s hand! haha! Oh, and there have been many other things too. But the current has me excited and gives me butterflies!
In 9th grade, I had a HUGE crush on this boy who went to my high school. I’m pretty sure I never even spoke to the kid, but I saw him in the halls a lot. I recall writing several many notes to my best friend about how cute I thought he was. It was mostly about “I saw him in the hall today and he looked so hot!” but I definitely recall having a huge crush on him. Even though I thought he was likely a huge dick, haha and he was never as tall as I generally like my guys to be!
He transferred schools the following year, and I’m sure I pretty much forgot about him. I mean, I remembered him, but “out of sight, out of mind.” Until Junior year when I transferred schools and happened to transfer to the school that he did! I remember my excitement when I saw him in the hall at school and telling my friend (the one who I wrote the notes to) about it. I think I spoke to him once and asked if he remembered me from our previous high school, I’m pretty sure that happened, but it’s been so long ago that I don’t remember exactly, and I certainly don’t remember his reply.
I transferred schools AGAIN senior year (yeah, I bounced around a lot) and didn’t run into him again until a couple years after that at some college party. I didn’t speak to him, but I definitely remember seeing him and feeling giddy and telling my current best friend who was with me at the time all about the crush I had on him in high school.
After that, I really never thought I’d see him again. I’m sure he crossed my mind over the years, but only as a brief passing thought when reminiscing about high school. Since I had never even had a conversation with the guy, it wasn’t like he was somebody I sat and thought about or anything. Just somebody I remembered having a crush on in high school.
I’m pretty sure I saw him at the bar one night a few months ago when a guy I know was trying to take me on a date. I say “trying” because while I’m sure he thought it was a “date,” it definitely was not! But I do recall seeing the guy, I think we made eye-contact, and feeling that giddy feeling. If I hadn’t been with that other guy and wasn’t concerned about being rude, I’m sure I would have spoken to him. But the guy I was with made it difficult for me to even speak to guys I actually did know, and I certainly didn’t need somebody trying to cock-block if I was going to try to speak to my high school crush! So, it was just a missed opportunity. But again, it wasn’t like the guy was an important part of my life, not that approaching him at the bar would make us magically fall in love and get married and live happily ever after! It was whatever.
So, since I’ve been single for quite some time, and definitely not getting any younger, and it’s so super hard to meet a decent guy, I joined an online dating site. I saw this guy’s profile on the site, but of course I wasn’t about to message him. I figured he was probably a huge dick and we would have nothing in common, and if he never spoke to me in high school, what would make me think he would message me on a dating website? Even if he did remember me from high school, I was sure he must have thought I was a huge weirdo and messaging him on a dating site probably wouldn’t improve his opinion of me but rather have the opposite effect.
You can imagine my surprise when I checked my messages last week to find a message from him in my inbox! And my greater surprise when he said he actually recognized me from high school! This whole time, I thought I had been INVISIBLE to him! And so we exchanged a few messages and then he gave me his number 🙂
We texted back and forth for a couple days, and one day actually spent like 7 hours texting eachother! So then we decided to hang out. We were going to do dinner, but he was tired after a long stressful day at work, so he just came over for drinks instead.
He is SO MUCH HOTTER than I remembered! OMG his eyes… He has these amazing brown eyes that when you look into them, you could just lose yourself. And his smile is like a piece of heaven. So with these things combined he is like kryptonite. And then on top of all that, he is SO SWEET! Like, not at all the dick I expected him to be. He is adorable.
So it has been a very passionate and exciting past few days. We hung out two nights in a row and he just texted me today and I miss his face. And I am in such disbelief that it’s actually happening, right now! With him! I mean I’m sure it’s going to end sooner than I would like, my relationships always do, and I will be sad and disappointed and all the above… but for right now, I’m just happy it’s happening 🙂